JPSimon's official review of The Village

[jpsimon]

The acting

I have never in my life witnessed such horrible, pathetic, halfassed acting in my life. The line delivery was just as terrible. It was as if every single scene only took one take because the director was in a rush and needed the film done ASAP. Either that or he is just half retarded.

In fact calling the acting horrible, pathetic, and halfassed would be a VERY large compliment. When people would talk to eachother be it the elders or the towns people there would be absolutely NO chemistry at all. The no chemistry thing would be tollerable if the actors actually tried though... but instead I witnessed the worst bit of acting in any movie ever. Barney the dinosaur does a better job then ANYONE in this movie.

When the movie finished, as i walked out of the theater, my body SHOOK (my hands were literally shaking) because i was SO angry at how pathetically horrible the acting was.

I could go on and on about the acting.. but i think you are starting to get an idea.


The Story

/edit/

ive thought about it more.. and ive decided.. the ending is just retarded. the end.

/edit/

The story was an interesting idea, but so flawed it wasn't even funny. The plot twists were good... but again so flawed. I dont feel the need to explain any more about the story... and i dont want to give away the twists.


Grading

Overall i give this movie an F- i would much rather have ate my own shit then see this.

[Howard Hughes]

He probably will never top The 6th Sense.....what a same....

[DDQ]

Funny you posted this. I got a call from a buddy earlier today, just telling me that he saw that movie too. He said it was the worst piece of crap ever, and he was warning everyone he knows to never see it.

[chaua1]

Yea, that movie was crap. I think ticket sales are going to go downhill once word gets around about the movie's ending. While watching the movie I was going to give it a D, but then after finding out the ending, I changed my grade to an F!

Adam

P.S. If only the 8 or so elders started this "community," how the heck did they get a whole society in there. Babies can't be made that fast.

[kennious]

Was it worse than Signs? Because Signs was ****ing horrible.

[jpsimon]

yeah exactly. they zoomed out and showed everyone eating dinner that one time... there were a crapload of people... i was talking about this with my mom... how hte **** did all these people get here.

Originally posted by chaua1


P.S. If only the 8 or so elders started this "community," how the heck did they get a whole society in there. Babies can't be made that fast. [/B]

[jpsimon]

there were people there who had to have been in their 20's who were not "elders" it just makes no sense

[chaua1]

I want my 8 bucks back!

[DRA4]

Oh you guys went to the movies, i went to the bar.

[jpsimon]

at 335 in the afternoon? someone is lonley.

Originally posted by DRA4
Oh you guys went to the movies, i went to the bar.

[Anthony]

...or very thirsty...

[JMG]

Originally posted by jpsimon
there were people there who had to have been in their 20's who were not "elders" it just makes no sense

P.S. If only the 8 or so elders started this "community," how the heck did they get a whole society in there. Babies can't be made that fast.

SPOILER

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They got there right before the people in their 20s were born. The picture was from the 70s if you notice the clothes, hairstyles and car. Besides, if this was such an obvious flaw, M Night could have just made it 20 elders and not effect the story. Also, maybe th eelders are the ones in charge, but they could have has other people in the same situations as them start the society... the other older people are in on it, but don't participate in the scheme.

Here is the deal with plotholes. If they can easily be solved with something that doesn't change the story too much, then it isn't a true plothole. The integrity of the story isn't lost.

So, lets say there are 20 elders... what will change but the cast? Nothing. The number of elders isn't important to the story, just that they existed.

Sure some people might be so affected as to deem a movie a POS, but suspension of belief to a reasonable point is necessary to get the story across. What was the point of the Village? That we are a prison to our own fears? Or that we use fear as a tool for survival? Either way, whatever you think, once you allow yourself to give in to the storytelling, you get the real deal and have an experience instead of just watchign some celluloid.

Just like in the 6th Sense, there are a few things that didn't quite pan out... like Bruce Willis' problems with the door to his study in the basement... as if he didn't know how he got in???? We had to let that slip because the story was so good and we were truely surprised in the end.

In the case of The Village, we all are expecting some huge twist in the end... so when it comes it like, "oh there it is" instead of "OMG!" and until that point we are sceptical of everything presented. I don't think The Village is as good as The 6th Sense, but it doesn't deserve to be calle da POS because of our expectations. If m Night's previous movies were never made this movie would get a B- instead of a D or F for some people IMHO.

[JMG]

Also, I thought it was pretty clever to have the standard issue literary 19th century jargon and mannerisms. For those who know the ending you can see how this was deliberate. I also thought Phoenix, Howard, and Brody were EXCELLENT.

Brody's character was genious in the expectations of his randomness. Phoenix was the perfect shy guy. Howard was surprisingly genuine in all of her scenes. She has real talent and this is a breakout role for her.

Overall I really like this movie, but I don't think everyone will like it.

[OverSpun]

Originally posted by DRA4
Oh you guys went to the movies, i went to the bar.

congrats, you successfully win the award for consistently having the ugliest girls on the planet in your sig. last year it was the nudespeed girls of waterfest 9, which i thought at the time were qualified for the pinnacle of ugly-ness... however this new specimen has far surpassed the most frightening image ever to pollute my brain. i am now blind. however, if the girls from last year dont jog your memory, perhaps a photoshop rendition of how they should have looked at waterfest will help...



edit: and because im bored i made you a new sig.

[jpsimon]

no i would have given it an F instead of an F- had this been Night's only movie.

but again i have never seen such pour amature pathetic acting in my life. Brody's character was horrible and he did a crappy job with it, the blind girl.. i was hoping she would die off because her acting gave me a headache. The blind annoying asshole that got stabbed i was glad he got stabbed because he was trying too hard to be "shy" throughout the whole movie. Can we say overacting? I can.

There was not one person in the movie that did good. Or anywhere near good. Had my little cousin not been there with me, i would have walked out of the theater.


there were many many kids of all different ages. in 30 years... 8 or so elders couldn't have created that many people... there were a lot of couples in their 20's to 30's there were not elders. Lots of kids of all ages... either those elders were pumping out the kids and then having their kids pump out kids by age 16.. this couldn't have happened.


and the story.. the story is just retarded... he couldn't come up with a good way to tie it all together so he throws in "oh and we got the government to not fly planes over the area" CREATIVE!!!!!!!!!!!


and back to the acting.. i honestly laughed OUT LOUD at some parts because the acting was just that bad.

Originally posted by JMG
Also, I thought it was pretty clever to have the standard issue literary 19th century jargon and mannerisms. For those who know the ending you can see how this was deliberate. I also thought Phoenix, Howard, and Brody were EXCELLENT.

Brody's character was genious in the expectations of his randomness. Phoenix was the perfect shy guy. Howard was surprisingly genuine in all of her scenes. She has real talent and this is a breakout role for her.

Overall I really like this movie, but I don't think everyone will like it.

[jpsimon]

i dont get your comment about seeing Night's other movies actually... are you saying his other ones are much better than this?

His only good movie was the 6th sense... all the others were crap crap crap.

[jpsimon]

oh ya know whos acting was really horrible. The blind girls father.. OH MAN. He didn't try at all!! I hope he never gets another job acting in his life.. in fact i hope none of the actors in this movie get another job.

[Marita]

jp-u can stop venting now sweetie

[JMG]

Originally posted by jpsimon
no i would have given it an F instead of an F- had this been Night's only movie.

but again i have never seen such pour amature pathetic acting in my life. Brody's character was horrible and he did a crappy job with it, the blind girl.. i was hoping she would die off because her acting gave me a headache. The blind annoying asshole that got stabbed i was glad he got stabbed because he was trying too hard to be "shy" throughout the whole movie. Can we say overacting? I can.

There was not one person in the movie that did good. Or anywhere near good. Had my little cousin not been there with me, i would have walked out of the theater.


there were many many kids of all different ages. in 30 years... 8 or so elders couldn't have created that many people... there were a lot of couples in their 20's to 30's there were not elders. Lots of kids of all ages... either those elders were pumping out the kids and then having their kids pump out kids by age 16.. this couldn't have happened.


and the story.. the story is just retarded... he couldn't come up with a good way to tie it all together so he throws in "oh and we got the government to not fly planes over the area" CREATIVE!!!!!!!!!!!


and back to the acting.. i honestly laughed OUT LOUD at some parts because the acting was just that bad.

SPOILERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

lol damn dude you hated this movie!!!

Well you are entitled to that. Some people say Hamet is overacted, but is that just creative dialogue??? That's just my opinion though. Considering all of the elders are "Acting" and the kids just learn to behave from them... know what I mean? They are all "Acting".


Anyway... that's just an excuse to what could be considered horrendous dialogue, except that we already know, from 6th Sense and Signs that M Night is a gifted writer and an actor's director. He shoudl be able to recognize stereotypical and cliche 19th century dialoge. Maybe it was supposed to be like that considering what the elders were trying to accomplish. Know what I mean?

As for the amount of elders and people in their 30s.. they didnt say that the elders were the only "parents" there.. just that they were the founders, along with Walker, and therefore made the big decisions as a council. They could have recruited others who wanted to start families, but don't have a position in the council and don't participate in the ruse. Knwo what I mean? Its a small plot hole that wasn't explained away explicitly, but can be inferred without stretching reality so much as to make it improbable or conflicting with the events in the story.

[JMG]

Originally posted by jpsimon
oh ya know whos acting was really horrible. The blind girls father.. OH MAN. He didn't try at all!! I hope he never gets another job acting in his life.. in fact i hope none of the actors in this movie get another job.

Id have to agree with you. I never liked Hurt as an actor.. then again, given the ending... maybe his is supposed to be like that and it was just creative casting???? I dunno, I'm willing to accepted it jsut so I can get over it and pick at the other stuff in the film.

[jpsimon]

MORE SPOILERS


tell me this... how did brody find the costume... put it on.. escape... and catch up to the blind girl when she had a whoel day start on him.

[jpsimon]

albeit she is blind.. but she runs around like she isn't blind.. so that isn't an excuse

[jpsimon]

how did brody know where to go to begin with to catch up to her

[JMG]

Originally posted by jpsimon
MORE SPOILERS


tell me this... how did brody find the costume... put it on.. escape... and catch up to the blind girl when she had a whoel day start on him.

SPOILERS




The last time we see Noah is after she hits him. Timeline:

1 She hits Noah
2 She visits the shed with her father that afternoon.
3 Noah leaves that night and decides to hide in the woods.
4 She leaves in the morning.
5 Noah sees them leaving and follows closely... waiting for her to be alone so they could either "play" or he really meant to harm her because his heart was broken.
6 Parents discover Noah is missing (this is a flashback scene later on in the film.. can't give it away yet!!!)
7 First escort leaves
8 She sets up camp in the rain and they wait it out
9 2nd escort leaves
10 She walks till nightfall
11 She is attacked by Noah in the morning after she escapes the pit

(I guess the real question is why did he wait until later in the day? I dunno, maybe he wanted to wait or didn't know if he wanted to go through with it... anything is possible, he isn't really sane. Why didn't he attack at night? Cause he's human and either gets sleepy or can't see well in the dark... she didn't light a fire remember?)

When the parents discovers Noah is missing, that could have been a flashback to breakfast or real time... doesn't matter cause he already left earlier and was right on their tail.

Besides.. she wasn't moving THAT fast. She still has to worry about tripping even with her cane. The escorts were so scared that they were behind her, and not leading... they were going her pace, so they could have been going the pace of a blind woman. Notice the speed she was moving right before she fell into the pit. Anyway that doesn't matter if he left right after them in the first place. It's nit-picking.

[JMG]

BTW I just came back from seeing it again with some people I promised to see it with... I am convinced that there are no plot holes and everything can be explained within reason... And they all liked the movie.

[JMG]

Originally posted by jpsimon
MORE SPOILERS


tell me this... how did brody find the costume... put it on.. escape... and catch up to the blind girl when she had a whoel day start on him.

SPOILERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!






Oh yeah... at that point he was raging and thrashing around. Maybe he smashed the chair on the floor and noticed it buckle. You know how they all hide under the floorboards? Well maybe he thought he could "hide" from all those who are angry at him under the floor and instead finds you-know-what. Notice that the window is open when they find him... he just broke the window. Maybe they thought he wouldn't resort to that. Like locking a child in a room... That was a mistake on the parent's part. How did he go undetected? That supports my theory that he left the night before the blind chick did and hid in the woods. No one would have seen him at night because of the limited light and the fact that the clubs and bars in the Village close at 10:30 for curfew.

[jpsimon]

dude the whole movie is a plot hole. they live in a giant open area that WOULD be found. "we had trouble getting the government to not fly planes over the area"

so so stupid and unrealistic. and im sorry if you think the acting is good.. then you must be blind

[jpsimon]

i would honestly rather take a shot of my own urine.. then sit through this "movie" a second time

[jpsimon]

and yes the elders were the original people there, they made that clear. not that many people could have spawned in the 20-30 years that they were there.

[jpsimon]

jesus christ the acting. holy mother of **** the acting was just pathetic it makes me SO angry. i would rather watch a teeny bopper film 10 times rather than seeing The Village once.


you probably liked Unbreakable eh?

[JMG]

Originally posted by jpsimon
and yes the elders were the original people there, they made that clear. not that many people could have spawned in the 20-30 years that they were there.

yeah they are the oridinal... but not the only ones that are in on it... it all started with thier support group then they recruited others to join in... hence the other 30 and 40 yr olds who aren't part of the council.... who said they limited the experiment to the one support group?

Besides this is basically a sci-fi movie. Complete plausability is near impossible. Almost all sci-fi movies have to be based in fallacy and slight of hand (truth) to ease the believability.


Besides... who says they were in the US? Could have been in Alaska! Less population! If you've been to rural places you will see how easily a community can disappear in a large fenced off wildlife preserve. Someone coudl just think... "hey theres a town down there with torches around it... damn Omish!!!"

No fly zones aren't that hard to do in rural areas.. esp with no large airports nearby. High flyign extinc birds are all it takes to get a no-fly zone.

"Paying off the governemnt" could be a referece to a supposed environmental interest group (set up by the Walker foundation or whatever) to contribute to the right people to apss a bill for no-fly zone in that area. They got a no fly for disneyworld for chrissakes!!

[JMG]

Originally posted by jpsimon
jesus christ the acting. holy mother of **** the acting was just pathetic it makes me SO angry. i would rather watch a teeny bopper film 10 times rather than seeing The Village once.


you probably liked Unbreakable eh?

they are ALL acting... remember? They are all pretending... so maybe it was intentional that they acted in an exaggereated their 19th century jargon and way of talking...

Besides I thought Phoenix, Howard and Brody were excellent for their roles.

EDIT*********
I liked everyhting about Unbreakable except that it was unnecessarily slow at some points and had a rushed ending... I liked the general idea, but the comic book slant was borderline rediculous. Again I gave in to the story and enjoyed it. I also dismissed Mr. Glass' comic book idea as a part of his insanity and obsession with comics as a kid. Through his misconcieved notion of polar opposites in the world, he was actually able to find someone who was "unbreakable". Take it literally and its rediculous... take it to another level and its almost weird how even Bruce willis' character falls for it and believes he is a "superhero" in the traditional comicbook sense... but in reality hes just unbreakable. The perfect anti-hero.

**************

[JMG]

Also in the picture J. Phoenix's character is seen as a baby in her mothers arms... that could explain his age... is he the oldest boy besides the elders and original couples they recruited?

Maybe thats why hes the only one not afraid?

[JMG]

Hey, im just saying that there are no plot holes... your opinion of the film itself is justified if you didn't enjoy it or get it or even liked it... all power to ya man.. we can't all like the same movies... I'm just saying... the other stuff you mentioned can be easily explained with extrapolation.

[jpsimon]

excuses excuses

worst movie ever.. possibly almost as bad as jurrasic park 3

[JMG]

Originally posted by jpsimon
excuses excuses

worst movie ever.. possibly almost as bad as jurrasic park 3

nothing is THAT bad!

And I added a comment about Unbreakable in my previous post.

[jpsimon]

dude everyone was horrible, there is no excuse for the horrible display of "acting".

the script was probably one of the worst ones in a long time, the way each line was delivered was far from "acting" the delay between lines in a convo between characters was just... i can't think of a word that explains how horrible it was.

[jpsimon]

at least we can agree about J3

[JMG]

Originally posted by jpsimon
dude everyone was horrible, there is no excuse for the horrible display of "acting".

the script was probably one of the worst ones in a long time, the way each line was delivered was far from "acting" the delay between lines in a convo between characters was just... i can't think of a word that explains how horrible it was.

it was a bit stretched... Hurt is notorious for unnecessary pauses... but I thought the pacing for everyhtign else was sincere for the nature of the film.

[Ryan S.]

Originally posted by jpsimon
oh ya know whos acting was really horrible. The blind girls father.. OH MAN. He didn't try at all!! I hope he never gets another job acting in his life.. in fact i hope none of the actors in this movie get another job.

go get laid dude......

i thought the movie was pretty good. it kind of ties into some of the real life stuff that is going on right now in the world.(i.e.- the taliban/afghanistan, new security laws that are being created in this country to protect us from our worst fears, etc., etc.,)