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View Full Version : you know your a b5 audi driver when?



partridgea4
01-13-2006, 11:57 PM
i saw this on a bmw forum it looked kinda fun and you can learn stuff from it too so everyone should partisapte!

start your thread by saying you know you are a b5 audi driver when.... see what people come up with its pritty funny and cool. "see what you can come up with."


you know your a b5 audi driver when dont have girlfriends/wifes anymore because you put more money and time into your car than them than them.

psipleasure
01-14-2006, 12:01 AM
you know your an audi driver when you get pissed off when people slam your door to hard, mess with your interior, and spill anything in your car

salz2135
01-14-2006, 12:02 AM
You know you're the driver of an older b5 when: you walk out to your car every morning and want to rip off/bash to bits off the stubby/special-ed mirror on the pass. side.

01'A41.8T
01-14-2006, 12:02 AM
You know your a B5 Audi driver when your driving a nice car and your not a tool. ie: 90% of BMW drivers.

MR VTEC
01-14-2006, 12:08 AM
when you revisit last year

jesster
01-14-2006, 12:15 AM
HERES A FEW:
when you get happy as hell when the cup is perfect size for your cup holder

...when you know the difference between casablanca & alpine white, santorin & pelican blue, imola & brilliant yellow...

When you someone jumps your car and notice's your dash and comments on how your in the christmas spirit but really your cel and abs lights are blinking and brake and oil lights are on.

partridgea4
01-14-2006, 12:29 AM
hahah good ones guys i like i like

heres some others
-when you start spending all your saved money for moding into fixing the dam thing.

-when you think every bmw want to race you

-also i would like to thank starbucks and monster energy for the cups that fit my cup holder

- when that stupid engine light is always on

- when people look at your boost gauge and ask "how it tells time"

SpyderSE2
01-14-2006, 12:51 AM
-when you drive ignoring the ABS light flashing and the brake light stuck on.

Gundem
01-14-2006, 01:43 AM
You know you are B5 audi driver when:
-save up 5 grand for a damn mod (PSI)
-you claim b6 and b7 are hidous

Gundem
01-14-2006, 01:44 AM
looking at these stuff you guys ... you guys have some efed up car.

god bless 2.8.

knock on wood.

Redgoat
01-14-2006, 01:51 AM
You know your a B5 Driver when your Airbag light is on and you dont care anymore


You know your a B5 Driver when you curse at your cupholders everytime you want to use them but realize they are just there to waste space

JMG
01-14-2006, 02:01 AM
You know your a B5 driver when you see a tight turn ahead and you speed up.

You know your a B5 (quattro) driver when you have tell your friend to not try to "spin the tires" or your clutch will glaze.

You know your a B5 driver when you tell your passenger to move his/her seat back and forth so the annoying squeek goes away.

You know your a B5 driver when you nervously eye your cup of (insert drink here) when you use your cup holder... yet STILL use it cause it's such a convenient place.

SeKKeY
01-14-2006, 02:36 AM
Originally posted by Redgoat
You know your a B5 Driver when your Airbag light is on and you dont care anymore


You know your a B5 Driver when you curse at your cupholders everytime you want to use them but realize they are just there to waste space

OH SO THATS HOW you get that squeek to go away

BarryT82
01-14-2006, 05:10 AM
When you move your drivers seat and the airbag light comes on.

jaredpgh
01-14-2006, 06:18 AM
when you get in an accident because you slid on ice at 12 degrees F - "but officer, the snowflake on my console display disappeared so i thought it was safe..."

Hassmeister
01-14-2006, 06:28 AM
When all your body panels have the same COLOR and you don't have a Hidious rear wing hangin' off the back.

a4cefed
01-14-2006, 07:49 AM
you know your a b5 driver when people say what that sound?
then you have a few choices to tell them :)
or

when you find yourself telling your girlfriend to stop talking because your trying to read something on audizine

RAyala2.7T
01-14-2006, 08:10 AM
You know when you're a b5 driver when you can't read the display on the instrument panel anymore.

TurbousMaximus
01-14-2006, 08:55 AM
you know your a b5 driver, when the first thing you do online is head to audizines classifides

4ingDrive
01-14-2006, 09:04 AM
You know you're a b5 driver when you have a vag com and none of your friends have diagnostic equipment for their cars.

Poopie
01-14-2006, 09:12 AM
You know your are a b5 audi driver when you compare the ass end your car to women.

juju4uofa
01-14-2006, 10:02 AM
You know you're a B5 driver when on every long trip you ask why didn't those crazy Germans give me a little more room so my knee wouldn't touch the center console.

You know you're a B5 driver if you apologize to every rear seat passenger due to the lack of room.

You know you're a B5 driver when your passenger ask "How the hell do I tilt the seat up"

DRA4
01-14-2006, 10:15 AM
You Know you're a B5 driver when every hot girl that gets into the car at night say, ohhh i like all those red lights, feels like i am in a plane.

yusoslo
01-14-2006, 11:00 AM
you know your a B5 driver when you start up your car and have to explain why it beeps 3 times. Damn ABS...

or you turn your heated passenger seat on full blast in the summer just to mess with your friends :)

or you turn your stereo up in the summer so you dont hear your brake calipers squeak over bumps when your windows are down

my favorite....when you rape your roomates 03 M3 in a race in the snow! I love AWD launches on fresh powder

Rosati
01-14-2006, 11:16 AM
Man you cali guys cant spell :p

geeboyjibber
01-14-2006, 11:19 AM
you know you're a B5 driver when:
- youve had to change your coilpacks numerous times.
- your friends make fun of the size of your stock turbo
- you dont ask about chips cuz youll get flamed

BranCKY3
01-14-2006, 11:20 AM
You know you're a B5 driver when your wheel bearing is louder than your exhaust.

partridgea4
01-14-2006, 11:39 AM
-you know ur a b5 audi driver when you turn up ur music so you dont have to hear any noises that arent good

-You know you're a B5 driver when your passenger ask "How the hell do I tilt the seat up" you say that little knob thing

- in low your gear your car will raddle for a second

lovintheboost
01-14-2006, 12:05 PM
you know youre a b5 driver when you wish you had a 6th gear on the freeway

avtiger1
01-14-2006, 12:14 PM
You know your'e a B5 driver when someone tells you "yep your control arms need to be replaced"

oc-drop
01-14-2006, 12:18 PM
Originally posted by SpyderSE2
-when you drive ignoring the ABS light flashing and the brake light stuck on.

Quattrocket
01-14-2006, 12:23 PM
When you have repaired so many things on you're car that you are almost an Audi Certified Mechanic

Chop4Life
01-14-2006, 01:11 PM
u know ur an A4 driver when u can tell how many miles u have left when the gas light turns on...

or u know ur an A4 driver when the passenger gets scared shitless when the low wiper fluid sound comes on and u just say, oh thats nothing haha

Poopie
01-14-2006, 01:24 PM
I can't believe this wasn't mentioned...

you know you drive a b5 A4 when you got a ton of chicks in your car. Yaayyaaahh

A4ed
01-14-2006, 01:27 PM
You know you're a B5 owner when:

Just when you get enough money for those H&Rs, the control arms go.

At night time, it looks like your tach starts at three and ends at 6.5. And your gas gauge dissapears.

While riding with others, you put your thumbs on the steering wheel to try to keep it from sqeaking.

You always put one hand on your drink while cornering.(from learning the hard way)

You'll spend only a couple seconds cleaning up your room, but you will spend from sun up to sun down washing, waxing, and polishing your baby.

Skippster86
01-14-2006, 01:51 PM
When you can buy oem parts from ecs but install them yourself because you dont want to go to the stealership.

When youve considered if its possible to put 89 octane in and asked about it here on audizine.

VB05
01-14-2006, 02:33 PM
You know you're a B5 driver when you find cans of flat coke in the cupholders under the middle armrest.

I know I do that all the time, I'll forget about them for like a week.

Lapkritis
01-14-2006, 04:32 PM
...when you consider leasing a new boxster when comparing your maintenance costs.

blacka41point8t
01-14-2006, 05:02 PM
You know your a b5 driver when your car is worth more then your house from all of the modifications you have put into it.

Quattrocket
01-14-2006, 05:10 PM
didnt we have one like this before? my fav from that one was, "when you drive by buildings with reflective glass windows so you can look at you're car when you drive by." LOL, I do that one all the time.

diegomatrix
01-14-2006, 05:18 PM
when you realized that your turbo car doesn't have a turbo boost gauge factory installed......

oh...wait.. the newer audi's STILL don't have them, huh?......

owde_eh4
01-14-2006, 05:22 PM
You know you are a b5 driver when you gulp coz you know that a CEL problem usually costs you $1000 (CDN) to resolve at the stealership....[headbang]

AudiGuy666
01-14-2006, 05:22 PM
Originally posted by jaredpgh
when you get in an accident because you slid on ice at 12 degrees F - "but officer, the snowflake on my console display disappeared so i thought it was safe..."

lmao [:p]

Diavan
01-14-2006, 05:25 PM
When night or day ... all you do ... is dream about a bigger TURBO.
[rolleyes]

AsianA408
01-14-2006, 06:22 PM
when you call ECS and ask for new upper or lower control arm.

diegomatrix
01-14-2006, 07:43 PM
Originally posted by AsianA408
when you call ECS and ask for new upper or lower control arm.

yea, and you get the wrong part

ecs = the ghey...hahahah...

a4cefed
01-14-2006, 07:51 PM
you know your a b5 driver when you have to explain to your date that casper opens and closes the sunroof at will.

when you have to make up lies about why the side mirror is brown

98Black30V
01-14-2006, 08:52 PM
When you run a seperate browser strictly for your car, with Audizine set as the homepage and all your online stores bookmarked in their own damn folder

avtiger1
01-27-2006, 07:29 AM
when your climate control switches to full blast when you hit a bump!

belinko
01-27-2006, 09:38 AM
When you get excited to see your ESP light flashing

Raddue
01-27-2006, 10:44 AM
Good God you guys have some funky problems with your cars.

You know you drive a B5 when people you know say, "can I drive? Pleeeeease?"

Audi A4 1.8T
01-27-2006, 10:55 AM
or when ur in a auto part store buying 5 ft of vacumm hoses

or staind carpet from tip over drinks(cuphloders suck)

or u know u have a b5 when u go into limp mode once a week

69Muscle
01-27-2006, 11:23 AM
When you gotta be basically dry humping the car for the key fob to unlock the door.

When you think "Does an equally as priced 3 series have this many problems?"

You keep telling yourself "you've got the best AWD system in the world" when u are going way too fast in the snow.

You hear that frightful Engine/oil/gas/warning light in your sleep and panic.

You have to pay $11 for a quart of special Power Steering Fluid.

You believe the engineers when they tell you a larger oil filter solve the sludge issues.

Your down to only 3 lil screws that hold on the bottom engine cover when u change your oil.

As your driving you wonder how the combo of heat, and blue make the mirrors brown.

greenday
01-27-2006, 12:38 PM
You know your a b5 audi driver when you refuse to listen to your bose stero system just so you can drive around and play the name the sound game.

You know your a b5 audi driver when you win the above game every time

Audiman78
01-27-2006, 02:29 PM
You might drive a 1.8t if............. You roll the windows down just to hear the turbo sing.

matt719
01-27-2006, 02:35 PM
You know you're a B5 driver when:

you have a negative balance in your checking account

a liter of soda has soaked into your cloth sport seats

you change your oil every 3,000 miles for fear of oil sludge

you think your car can pull a Civic but in reality it can't

your CDs skip at high volume because the CD changer is mounted under the rear speakers

Raddue
01-27-2006, 03:21 PM
You know you're an Audi driver when you drive to the train station in downtown Portland to drop off your girlfriend, and all of the homeless people gawk at your car.

Okay, okay, they do that with any car. But at least it makes the cabbies jealous.

01'A41.8T
01-27-2006, 03:34 PM
Originally posted by 69Muscle
When you gotta be basically dry humping the car for the key fob to unlock the door.

Haha this made me laugh out loud.

Eurotuned_A4
01-27-2006, 03:50 PM
^^^x2, that is definately true. sometimes i see hot girls while im walking to my car and i press the button so the lights flash and they look at it and me just so i can feel like a pimp. however im always to far from my car for that to happen...lol. so no one really knows im cool like that.[:p]

TurbousMaximus
01-27-2006, 04:01 PM
then you put it up to your chin for better distance...then the chicks like wtf does he have a key fob attached to his face for?

ryanmcell
01-27-2006, 04:01 PM
heres a good one im surprised nobody mentioned...


you know your a b5 owner when your CEL is on but you dont care cuz u know its just for the secondary air injection.

Eurotuned_A4
01-27-2006, 04:08 PM
Originally posted by TurbousMaximus
then you put it up to your chin for better distance...then the chicks like wtf does he have a key fob attached to his face for?

lol, i tried that 1 time but it didnt work.....i never did it again.

ceas
01-27-2006, 04:32 PM
you know your a b5 driver when you can never tell for sure how much gas is in your tank until you get to the pump and it rapes your wallet..

the only reason you bought an intake was so that you could hear the diverter noise...

when the only thing fast on your car are the parts that break fast

jones3000
01-27-2006, 05:00 PM
when you glance back at your car from 20 feet, 30 feet, 40 feet, 45 feet, and 50 feet away until you get into the building.

partridgea4
01-27-2006, 05:05 PM
haha good ones guys i like kep em comin

how about when you need to go through a dealerto get the stupid sauttered chip on. cant do it yourself unless your narly.
sry for the miss spellings

Hassmeister
01-27-2006, 06:28 PM
When you are driving the wife back from the airport and on the way home your Cat falls out of its flange and your car sounds like you are at the drag strip with the Headers un- capped.
And she bicthes at you about how much better her 50k GMC SUV is than your true love... the noisy Audi you are driving right now.

drkenan
01-27-2006, 07:14 PM
You know you're a B5 Audi driver when people think the big "VAG_COM" folder on your office computer is some kind of porn.

When your list of repairs exceeds your list of mods.

When you explain to your friend why your car is better than the black badgeless B5 that you walk past because it doesn't have [insert myriad of options here].

R-Dub
01-27-2006, 07:24 PM
You know your a B5 A4 owner when you think you hear a flock of geese going overhead but then people tell you its your car alarm going off.

2.8AWD
01-27-2006, 08:33 PM
You know you are a B5 owner when you replace wheel bearings more than oil changes

When you cant wait for winter to fully utilize AWD

When you go to change the temperature and your climate control disappears at the push of a putton

When you check your mirrors and one side is rusted and the other is special-ed

When you have to pay 80 bux to get your radio turned back on

When you dont even want to know what the next thing to replace is going to cost

And for me personally...when you laugh at the guy doing your alignment when he says your thrust angle is in spec.

madvillainb5
01-27-2006, 11:18 PM
When you wished that the A4 has no relations to the Passat.

When you think that your interior is Black when it is actually Blue under sun light.

When everyone thinks a Stock 1.8T is Fast because of the Turbo and AWD features.

JeffM1587
01-27-2006, 11:46 PM
Originally posted by madvillainb5

When you think that your interior is Black when it is actually Blue under sun light.

[/B]
haha thats great, mine is like that to. i still dont know the true color of my car on the inside

AudiA4_20T
01-28-2006, 02:09 PM
You know your a B5 A4 owner when your laptop (VAG-COM) has its spot in the garage next to your rachet set....

You know your a B5 A4 owner when you cant tell if your clutch is actually going or it just grabs when your knee is in your chest

You know your a B5 A4 (Quattro) owner when your favorite time on the roads is before the plow trucks go out...

Nukkah03
01-28-2006, 03:49 PM
You know your a B5 owner, when the crap bose system turns the volume up by itself.

You only owned it for 2 years and you have $6000+ in receipts for repairs.

You know you own a B5 with it takes 2 hours to unlock with the fob, damn vacuum locks!!

ooa4oo
01-28-2006, 06:24 PM
..when you turn your sunroof knob and then say, "what the.."

..when you try to google for a decent rear lip and then say, "what the.."

..when someone getting in your car tries to set their drink and says, "what the.."

oh..and when you sometimes feel your car is kinda gay because its too bubbly and cute stock.

-_-